A TROUBLING SECRET
Some of the messages presented in modern New Age literature reek of commercialism. The Law of Attraction is promoted as a way to fulfill your desires and possess whatever you want. With such power, the ability to order reality to my whims, I fear widespread mastery of such a discipline would reduce the universe to a theater of egotistical, temporal self-indulgence.
I'm not seeing these practices presented as a way to promote the betterment of humanity, and love is not a part of the vernacular. This troubles me deeply. I'm compelled to discover if true wisdom undergirds mysticism, which at a minimum would at least seek to maintain the natural balance of things. So I have little interest in exploring what I see as a myopic distortion of what might otherwise be a worthwhile pursuit of union with God.
Despite the circumstances leading up to this point in my life, I am still wary of devoting myself fully to this journey. The schools of thought I've explored have proven intriguing, yet ultimately disappointing. For one it seems altogether too lofty, in some way cheapening all the ordinary things that keep life going. If a person's thoughts are always pointed vertically, how can they hope to be present in their daily lives? How can they have their mind on things such as family or career? Additionally, I find TM gives me over to a brooding, serious mood. It hasn't proven life-giving for me; neither has it commended itself to revealing any purpose behind living it. I will need to reconcile these issues before proceeding.