RESISTANCE
I’m encountering escalating pushback from people I love concerning where my new desire for unconditional dependence on God may lead. I know it’s unconventional to say the least, and is being cast as selfish and irresponsible. Sadly, I confess I'm having difficulty managing this. My intimacy with God and sense of self and purpose isn't developed enough for this isolation to just roll right off my back. Unfortunately, it directly attacks my sense of worth - though I know it shouldn't - and I want it to stop.
This is the roll of faith, the willingness to embark upon paths that are not yet paths, to navigate the uncharted landscape and lay down roads upon which others may more easily tread. It should not surprise me that others question both my direction and the undertaking itself.
What are you thinking?
Where do you hope this will this lead?
What can you possibly hope to accomplish?
These are common questions that most reasonable people ask, and I should fault neither myself nor them for either the questioning or the lack of clear answers.
All I can say is that I'm following the voice of God to places I know not where for reasons I know not why. It's part of my walk with God and the relationship I'm meant to build with him along the way. To push frontiers is an intrinsic part of who I am, and I mustn't second guess myself or feel ashamed for it. I am going to walk this path either way, so better to approach it with a positive attitude. It will be more enriching and enjoyable that way.